rehearsal

as i sit in front of my keyboard today, i find myself feeling lighthearted and smiling. i can't think of a good reason really. i had plans for the morning and the afternoon, but they both fell to the wayside. yet here i am. my house resembles the pathway of a small tornado, and i have paperwork to finish at my office. all these things will come though. right now, i am floating in feel good.

of course, if you know me, this doesn't happen often. i have learned that i spend most of my waking hours in some sort of twisted self-absorption or narcissistic state in which i tear myself apart like a lost puppy does furniture when left alone in the house.

but not today. (silently thanks the universe)

i crossed paths with someone i know pretty well who has releapsed on meth. they have been trying to hide it- mostly from themselves- but now don't have that option. they have lost their job, their housing, and they have been released from duty from their volunteer work. it's a very common and very sad scenario. i tried to help this person get into treatment. they had an opportunity to get treatment very recently, but didn't take advantage of it. this was work-related and a subsequent loss of income may have changed their mind.

i wish peace today for all people i know struggling with their addicitons or their emotions. my own experience has given me insight that even after the drugs are gone, the damage has only begun to be addressed. that repair takes time. it takes courage, strength, and lots of understanding and insight. 

just look at new orleans.

rehearsal.... recovery.. reconstruction... rebuilding.. redoing... all have amazing similarities. they can be slapped together to save time, energy, and money. or they can be designed, planned, and executed with care. certainly there ain't no guarantees as the outcomes, but my money is on taking a designed approach. this way, there is something to fall back on for inspiration if something goes awry...

doesn't something always go awry?