image credit... crriminallyinnocent.tumblr.com
Somebody loses and somebody wins
And one day it's kicks, then it's kicks in the shins
But the planet spins, and the world goes 'round-
But the world goes 'round
But the world goes 'round
Sometimes your dreams get broken in pieces
But that doesn't matter at all
Take it from me, there's still gonna be
A summer, a winter, a spring and a fall
And sometimes a friend starts treating you bad
But the world goes 'round....
And sometimes your heart breaks with a deafening sound...
life has been moving quite quickly as of late. i have more free time and i feel as if things are moving faster- no way to explain it and no way to see it without more distance. it's mostly changing the workplace that has me in a tizzy. i have volunteers working 3 hours every morning greeting and giving referrals and resources. it's a fairly easy intervention, but it required extra focus and answering a lot more questions. and then there is minimal push back from the other departments. it's gonna take awhile for these others to realize the value.
i have been working in building a peer support network at our little clinic. it is kinda magnificent watching it unfold. the enthusiasm, the volunteerism, the waft of hope and optimism that is smudging our corridors. bit by bit idea becomes integrated and hopefully second nature. i have emailed out a 2nd invitation to roughly 15 community organizations to join an advisory council with our peers. i also included a letter of explanation, a rough 3 year plan we drafted for the peer support efforts, some marketing outlines for a "recovery walk" and a toolkit for a "recovery idol" event put together so lovingly by Derrick Ford and the Phildadelphia Recovery Community.
please understand that this seems a grand sweeping gesture on my part. it is an affirmation in a very big way. i am completely working with faith to create reality here. i feel the entire scope of hope that all of these schemes and dreams will make it to this dimension. at the same time, my lifetime's worth of less-than thoughts and not-worthy feelings which have pulled my proverbial wagon the majority of my life are rearing their heads, stomping their hooves, and whinnying and chortling syncopated in revolt to take the lead.
in my recovery and in working with others, i have realized that my old beliefs and patterns will return. and return. and return again. the trick is to realize when this return happens, that i don't have to continue to think and do the way i did before- that i have new ways to think and do- and then i have to connect to those. and i started this journey doing affirmations and following the lead of grand dame louise hay. either way, i'm affirming, and fighting, and continuing to breathe. and the world goes round.